Pain

They say when you die the pain stops. That when your heart stops beating people cant hurt you. Well they'er wrong. Just because it stops doesnt mean it cant be broken. Over and over again.

I should have given up hope when Michelle was taken from me. But I held out, for 80 years even for a vampire thats along time, watching the world change around me...from almost no phones to everyone carrying it around one in their pockets. And watched alone...waiting in the night. Foolish..

I didnt come to Santa Cruz to find someone to hold...but I did or at least thought I had until she slipped through my arms...Then Lily my rose...I love her as much as I do Fiona..but Fiona has Sally now..and soon I'll stand watch them marry...Dance with the bride before slipping away unoticed.

Yes I love Lily and it rips me up inside..but she wants her freedom and who can blame her.

So I will live alone...watch from the shadows help where I can bury myself in my gems. Come when Im needed and slip away when Im not.

I've lived alone before...I can do it again. A large empty house. All I wanted was to fill with sounds of a family or as close as I could make it...But that dream is as dead as I am.

I'll live alone as I was obvisoulsy ment to accept my fate and stop fighting for what Im not meant have..and I will continue.